Mothers Archives | Linda Smallbones https://lindasmallbones.com/category/mothers/ Fresh Hope Play Theraphy and Counselling Fri, 15 Sep 2023 13:55:35 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.6.2 It’s Friday but Mother’s Day is coming https://lindasmallbones.com/its-friday-but-mothers-day-is-coming/ Fri, 15 Sep 2023 13:55:35 +0000 http://dot6.desdesignsdot.co.za/?p=3030 I read this poem, “It’s not my turn”, written by a mom the other day that brought back so many memories and resentments from when my kids were really little. I honestly wish I had read this at the time to get some perspective and a different mindset. Everyone told me “This stage goes by…

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I read this poem, “It’s not my turn”, written by a mom the other day that brought back so many memories and resentments from when my kids were really little. I honestly wish I had read this at the time to get some perspective and a different mindset.

Everyone told me “This stage goes by so fast, cherish every single moment.” Grrr. I will not say it to anyone else because I know what it’s like to be in the middle of it all, feeling like it will never end, and feeling like whatever I did it was still never enough to meet the relentless demand of parenting two very small children. My two were 14 months apart, an unplanned (tiny) gap. Nothing prepared me for the sheer physicality of having two children under two, let alone the emotional turmoil of it all. Being an introvert didn’t help either, there was no time to just be on my own.

I wish I had read this poem then, to help me come to terms with the fact that it was simply not my turn to be on my own, to sit and read a book or journal. And that it was my turn to be the full-time nurturer, play mate and caregiver of my children. Someone telling me would NOT have helped. Reading this, a poem from another mom’s perspective, written with honesty and integrity maybe would have helped.

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“Toddlers in the Garden” A precious, but tough stage!

So, I have permission to share it now with you  (Thank you Kelcey!). In case it helps you where you’re at right now.

It’s not my turn.

By Kelcey  (www.okiesunshine.com)

It’s not my turn.

It’s not my turn to go where I want, when I want.

It’s not my turn to put my wants and needs first.

It’s not my turn to get butterflies on a first date.

It’s not my turn to plan a wedding.

I’ve had my turn.

It’s not my turn to leisurely enjoy my coffee with slow mornings.

It’s not my turn to explore all of my interests and hobbies.

It’s not my turn to spend my days as I please.

It’s not my turn to spoil grandchildren.

Hopefully, I’ll have my turn.

It’s not my turn to take a Mediterranean vacation.

It’s not my turn to maintain a luscious backyard oasis.

It’s not my turn to have abs.

It’s not my turn to binge-watch Netflix when I’ve had a hard week.

Maybe one day I’ll have a turn…or, maybe not.

But, it is my turn…

It’s my turn to have some sleepless nights.

It’s my turn for late-night snacks, so I don’t have to share.

It’s my turn to have my clothes stretched out by little hands.

It’s my turn to have fingerprints on the screen door.

It’s my turn to have Cocomelon stuck in my head.

It’s my turn to do laundry. So. Much. Laundry.

It’s my turn to keep romance alive amidst the routine.

But even more than that,

It’s my turn to start family traditions.

It’s my turn to memorize the perfect squishiness of chubby baby faces.

It’s my turn to let a popsicle make anything better.

It’s my turn to heal boo-boo’s with a kiss.

It’s my turn to cuddle and rock.

It’s my turn for park days and play dates.

It’s my turn for first steps, first words, and first days of school.

It’s my turn to earn my laugh lines and gray hairs.

It’s my turn to soak up the beautiful, exhausting, magic of motherhood while the turn is still mine.

You can find Kelcey’s website here . You can also find her on FB and Instagram @okiesunshineblog

What is it your turn for now? What is it not your turn for? What can you appreciate about the current stage you’re in?

Moms, this Mother’s Day, may you have a turn to receive something nice for yourself. Or if it’s not given to you, may you do or buy something nice for yourself. And may it NOT be your turn to do housework or dishes!

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