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PLAY for the sheer joy of it
Children will follow the fun almost anywhere!
Children find fun, silliness, laughter and play utterly compelling. They will follow the fun almost anywhere. They know that they need it, it is life-giving for them. Of all the things play brings, children know that the experience of joy is most important!
In my play therapy practice, I haven’t yet had a child not wanting to return to play with me even when they were reticent to come in the first place. I have the advantage and privilege of being with children one on one doing what they love to do best. I also take time to seek out what they will really get joy from, and we try to do those things for at least half the time in the sessions. Play therapy is compelling to children because they have a dedicated adult available with full attention to respond to them in the moment. Play therapy is purposeful, however, if we are not also doing things for the sheer joy of it, it wouldn’t be play!
Free, non-purposeful, child-lead play in families, where the child gets to decide where and what to play is so necessary. Obviously, there are boundaries around keeping safe and respecting one another’s likes and dislikes. For example, at one point our family had a meal once a month where we ate with our hands. Two sensory seekers (ie: LOVE getting hands messy) loved this ritual in our family, and the other two did not! We had to re-think this ritual and find another one that everyone could enjoy.
By talking about child-lead play I am not saying the child has to dictate to everyone what is going to happen. But, the child’s voice should be heard, listened to, and respected.
We spend a lot of time telling our kids what to do because things need to get done. Play time should be about putting away tasks and devices and focusing on one another in the present, negotiating towards play activities that will be joyful for everyone. Learning what one another likes and compromising is a valuable social skill they can hone over time.
It’s nearly the weekend! I hope you get the chance to play, be silly and really laugh with deep joy during this time. The connection enJOYment brings cannot be underestimated!
Here are some ideas from previous posts of games to play… the hot pot game and the chocolate game. Also, make popcorn or read a funny poem!
Or, paint each other’s toenails (c’mon, dad, you can!), play charades, go for a walk and see who can make up the silliest walk, do a treasure hunt, play a board game. I can HIGHLY recommend Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza (yup, it’s a card game for real!). Make a list as a family, brainstorm all the fun things you all like to do and keep the ideas somewhere safe for when you need some inspiration. Don’t overt think it! Just do it!
Let me know what you play so we can share ideas for other families!